New Routines for a New Normal
I think the difference between a habit and a routine is the application of conscious effort. A habit is something that happens, and that you continue to allow. A routine is a choice you enforce and dedicate yourself to doing. In the last few weeks, things on a global scale have changed dramatically, and rapidly. Between navigating what’s right and what’s available, we’re all having to adjust to a new reality as well as keep aware of our emotional state. This is an awful lot to juggle, and can easily overwhelm. I’ve taken on some habits in order to better adjust, maintain inner calm for myself and others, honor my body and emotions, and improve my relationship to the moment at hand. A lot of these have to do with a newfound appreciation for what often gets easily overlooked; for a spiritual practice that I often sleep on, or think “maybe later” about. That “later” is usually based on the assumption of business as usual. Knowing generally what to expect. This has all changed, and with it I change too.
GOODBYE COFFEE, UNTIL WE MEET AGAIN
My time in Morocco taught me the value of a solid breakfast. A little toast, butter, jam, an egg here and there - it can change everything about a day. Two months ago you’d find me beginning the day with a cup of coffee, a little oat milk, and little else until about 2pm. This is a guaranteed dead end to a productive, energized and satisfying mindset. I’d get plenty of work done, but would often feel like the horse at the end of True Grit by the time I crawled into bed. Did I know that this habit was zapping my adrenals? Yes. What did I do about it? Drink a little water…and more coffee. It’s rude to demand so much from a body that simply wants sustenance, but has become a very normal way of existing under economy-first culture. This isn’t to say that coffee is terrible and you should stop drinking it. The coffee bean was and is a natural medicine, after all. But like all medicines, it can backfire if overused, abused, or too heavily relied upon. I’ve chosen to swap coffee for tea, particularly because of the physical response I have to it. Coffee gives me a high. I admittedly love the feeling of mental mania, having a quick mental subway station experience with moving thoughts, and being “on.” But I really don’t love the outcome. When the high is over, I’m physically drained, mentally short-circuited, and - here’s the big one - extremely emotionally scrambled. That last part begins before I even realize it, with the first sip that sends me into happy jittery nervous world. While we now experiences a daily onslaught of collective anxiety inducing news flashes, the last thing I need is a hyper-tense body and mind to match. Anxiety leads worry, worry leads to fear. Overuse of anxious feelings does substantial damage to our immune and nervous system. Staying calm is a blessing, especially when others have to be quarantined with me.
SOCIAL MEDIA DISTANCING
It’s safe to say that sources of media find themselves booming in times of crisis. Desperation paired with sensational headlines meant to provoke can lead to rapid-fire reshares, skimmed over details, misinformation, and a lack of fact checking. Then there’s mob mentality. The anger that comes with uncertainty can be inhuman, and people turn on each other quickly forgetting that there is a human being with emotions and value looking in from the other screens. With these details in mind, I’ve been limiting my time on social media, adjusting my involvement so that I do not feed the frenzy, or get lost in it.
I’ve also been extremely grateful for the inspiring voices of community that I’ve had the pleasure of interacting with and learning from. In pruning, more space is made for what feels supportive. A special thanks to everyone using their expertise to share what they know, and create a true network of sensitivity and compassionate awareness. Having direct insight from herbalists, healers, doctors, first responders, artists, kitchen witches, and the occasional comedian has been helpful, healing, and supportive to the max.
SITTING WITH MYSELF
I used to meditate twice a day, everyday. But the cult of it all made me turn a sharp left into Never Meditate Ever Again Land, which is where I’ve lived for years. It maybe wasn’t the best choice, but sometimes you have to completely unearth and bomb out the garden plot to start over again with fresh soil. So that’s what I’ve done; and the timing couldn’t be better. I’ve been waking up a lot in the middle of the night from bad dreams, and massive anxiety. I’ve been feeling these sensations in the daytime, as well. A rocket of intense panic will take over. I’ll breathe through it, but also have to sit down and consciously try to talk myself down from the emotional ledge and remove the blindfold. This task is worlds easier and much more integrated with a regular meditation routine. I’m talking dedicated moments of sitting on my ass and clearing my mind. Which in reality isn’t “clearing” anything. My partner asked what meditation does, and here’s what I came up with: imagine your brain is a sponge. Meditation, over time, wrings out the sponge. All the thoughts and feelings fall into color-categorized containers made of changeable goop. Then there’s one that’s more like a grey pit, and that’s the compost bin. This is where unhelpful thoughts go to be recycled into fresh soil. I also said it’s like training the dogs within, because they want to be recognized and given purpose, otherwise they just fight and destroy things. I don’t actually see any of these visuals while I meditate, but I feel them. If this visual is helpful though, give it a shot. Your mind can feel really busy while meditating especially in the beginning, and that’s totally fine. The work is passive, and happens through trust. Trust equals dedication to the routine. Meditation is choose-your-own-adventure. You can approach it strictly, you can be very relaxed, or you can focus on a dedicated prayer or thought. Ultimately it’s about your intention.
GIVING THANKS TO PLANTS
Everyday I’ve been going outside, standing under the large Doug Fir tree that grows in my backyard, and giving it a hug. It doesn’t even feel silly anymore. At first it did, totally. But the feeling of gratitude that is shared between life forms is way more impactful than any worry about what neighbors might think. And that’s only increasing as I do this. It’s a practice, but it’s also interaction with a friend. Especially in moments of isolation, we have this great opportunity to spend time with species that aren’t human and get to know them better, as well as get to know ourselves better too. That’s what a healthy friendship is for, right? We learn to relate to others, enact kindness and compassion, and develop strength together. This tree has managed to live through so many developments here. It has watched families change, babies of all species birthed, grow, and pass on. It’s witnessed the loss of its own community as well as others, and supported countless life forms, from branches to roots. What have I done? What do I do? This tree encourages me to see my life as one of purpose. It dances in the harsh weather, and stands in grace through sun and moon, day by day. The human/plant relationship should be symbiotic, but sadly we have failed them. This is a beautiful way to begin the healing process between us, from the ground up. It’s also a powerful way to realign with ancestral wisdom. In my lineage, animism and plant worship/usage/tending has been long practiced. Plants are a foundational necessity to life on this planet, making this a common practice for most. I encourage you to seek this wisdom in your own lineage, invoking ancestors who love you, and thanking the plants who collectively carry the remains and energies of us all. Many people live in urban environments with less access to trees, in buildings removed from yardspace, or in different bioregions. It is no less powerful to make this connection with a plant that lives with you indoors, a shrub that you see everyday on your walk, the sun through your window at a certain time of day, or a single shining star.
BODY IN MOTION
Whether you’re a celestial body, a body of water, a body of land, or a bit of all three as a human being, stagnancy is the worst! Motion is the nature of creation, and to move the body is a way to enact empowered awareness of your divine form. What stretching looks like for me will probably look very different than someone else. However you choose to move your body is up to YOU. The function is not to obtain someone else’s ideal, but to welcome our body to a new moment, to say thank you for what it offers and is capable of, to remember the stars and plants and oceans that we contain, and to connect all the pieces of the self. Stretching cleanses the lymphs, increases circulation of blood and oxygen, draws attention to passive soreness that we may not notice until we move, and it can be an immense source of joyful play. Some days I do the basic sun salutation routine I learned in high school P.E. class, incorporating some spinal twists and push ups. Other days I play music and let my body do whatever it wants, with plenty of open accordion’esque rib expression. Sometimes I sweat, sometimes I don’t. You don’t need special clothes. In fact you don’t need clothes at all. For me, the consistency lies in the dedication of movement. If you’ve had a practice that you’ve fallen out of, now might be a great time to say hello to it again. I’m always reminding myself that my body is doing the best it can. A little kindness and support from the inside can go far.
BREATHING WITH BIRDS
I love my home. It’s where I get to do things like cook, bathe, talk, watch things, grow things, write things, sleep and dream. But if I’m being honest, I don’t entirely trust the standardized structure of modern houses. There are an awful lot of straight lines, boxy squares and rectangles, limitations, perfect tight corners for mold and dust, an interior skeleton of old or new chemical-ridden body parts, and circuitry reflecting an industrial age that we’re still addicted to. So I go outside to remember. This is something I’ve been doing every single day. In the morning, or midday depending on the weather, I go outside, breathe deeply, and watch the birds. Things are happening that I didn’t notice before. A blue cardinal jumped around and picked at the star magnolia tree in our yard, perhaps after some of its seeds. Its bright blue feathers and dramatic black point were contrasted against the brown and white of the branches and its flowers. He then quickly swooped down and out of sight into a bush. When I looked around to see what caused the disturbance, I saw crows perched on power lines, staring down at him like snipers. One of the crows flew in a corkscrew style over a fence. I’ve witnessed the politics of birds, noticed new growth in the plants, and felt small changes in the weather all while simply breathing. This is a deeply calming part of my day that allows me to practice integrated awareness and understanding about where I live, who and what I am within this ecosystem, and who my plant and animals neighbors are. This is also possible to try with an open window, taking in whatever aspect of life displays itself. Birds just happen to have a neighborhood drama where I live, and are easy to watch.
INVITING FRESH AIR INDOORS
It’s not always easy to get fresh air, especially when living in a city or suburb. Oil diffusing could be either a helpful bonus, or a great way to bring the outdoors in. And you don’t even need a fancy diffuser. If you’re looking for one, you can choose from either a plug-in mister, or a tea-light oil burner. But anyone can use a small pot on the stove. This is my daily go-to. All you need are a few cups of water in your pot, some drops of essential oil, or fresh or dried herbs. Set at mid-heat, add 3 - 6 drops of an antiviral essential oil such as rosemary, eucalyptus, bergamot, or cinnamon. You can also diffuse with plants directly. Drop a stick of cinnamon into your water, a branch of eucalyptus, a sprig of rosemary, oregano, or thyme. This is a great way to cleanse the air, move the stagnant out, and encourage deep breathing while at home.
Tea is also a wonderful way to ingest some freshness of the great outdoors. Hot water plus herbs equal medicine. This is for safe-to-ingest herbs and roots only, not for essential oils. Herbs and plants such as rosemary, thyme, mint, basil, ginger, tumeric, garlic (yes, garlic tea), licorice, or lemon balm. Add honey or maple syrup if it tastes extra medicine’y. If you decide to give these teas a try, save whats steeped and add to a soup, or sauce.
GRATITUDE LIST
Because I have a lot less to write these days in my weekly calendar, I’ve adjusted it to be a nightly gratitude list. I fill the slot for each day with everything that comes to mind that I know I could not be where I am right now without. That’s certain people at certain times, seeds that have sprouted, a successful moment, pleasures and failures alike that taught me a necessary lesson, memories, moments, food, the elements - it changes day by day as a stream of consciousness magical exercise. I really appreciate having a specific writing space for it too. If you’re anything like me, you’ll pressure yourself to fill a page - then another - then feel bad when you haven’t filled a whole book with what you’re grateful for, accidentally sabotaging yourself on the way to doing a very casual and healing task. Having a slot means that I get to write until it’s full, and look forward to the next day. You can do this by designating space in a journal page, or drawing a line as a marker to stop. This has been particularly instrumental on days that I’ve struggled with acceptance, or felt depressed or overwhelmed. It does not fail to bring me back to my center, reminding me that I actually am tremendously blessed. It’s easy to take the obvious for granted, and to forget the majesty of life when routine is rattled. A gratitude list done every day is a promise to honor the mystery of life and witness the lessons. Because they are always there.
Do what feels right to you; these are just suggestions based on what I’ve found works well for me. We’re all in this together. We can’t not be. I’d love to hear any suggestions or reflections about your new routine amidst change. Feel free to leave a comment below. So much love to you all.
